Honor Your Negative EmotionJanuary 23rd, 2012 by Thea Pueschel
We live in a time where you see titles of blogs, books, videos regarding manifestation and positivity. The meta-message may appear to be “if you are not in this constant state of receiving and bliss your life will continue to suck. Deny your emotions unless they are positive.” This may not be the true meta-message but some interpret self-denial of emotion as a means to overcome life situation. Continually chasing the carrot at the end of the stick. Perhaps feeling that carrot is unfair, but not taking the time to experience the emotional dissatisfaction that the process may bring or denying being present because one must focus on the carrot.
Can you manifest things in your life? Of course! Can you do it with positivity? Undoubtedly! In this blog, I am speaking of giving emotional space and the freedom to experience your anger or negative emotions. By honoring your emotions you are increasing the likelihood of manifesting the life you want and positivity.
A while back a colleague was talking of life stressors and being angry. Said person had moved to new location for a job opportunity, said job opportunity didn’t work out, dissolution of a relationship, unethical business practices of another entity, and loss of 2 loved ones. The person was clinging to the positive, not allowing the darkness to seep in from their perspective. As the person spoke about not allowing themself to be angry regarding the experience but wondering how much suffering they could take. Their anger emerged from every pore in their skin releasing like ectoplasm on those in the surroundings. There was rage, and deservedly so. None of their losses were just a mere inconvenience but actual loss… and just one of them would create a sense of shaking ground beneath anyone’s feet.
As we spoke, another person was present. And stated how they resented the fact this person felt they were suffering. And claimed that the other person whose life had been involved in a topsy-turvy switcheroo was just selfish and these were first world problems. Noticing the transference and projection abounding from both individuals. I stated that human suffering is suffering. Subconsciously it doesn’t matter if you are a victim of a national disaster or victim of circumstance there is no delineation. Suffering is suffering and real to each person. The anger and denial of anger was swelling between the two. I suggested to the person of great loss, to give themself each day space to be angry for 5 minutes allowing the rage to swell up and feel the emotion. And how like a pressure valve, it would slowly release in a gentler manner than the current expression.
We cannot control our emotions, but we can choose how to react to them. Chop vegetables, scream into a pillow, pull weeds, tear apart cardboard. Whatever it is that you need to do to express your anger/rage in a productive nondestructive method do. Honor that emotion. Release that emotion. Anger when not honored is a messy gooey relationship challenging emotion. Snarkiness, being dismissive, snappish and rude tend to emerge as one tries to bottle their anger. Assess whether or not you are able to work through the negative emotion or if you would benefit from outside assistance. An objective third-party perspective may offer the release you are seeking.
DIY Recipe for Honoring your Negative Emotion
1 part anger or negative emotion
1 part acknowledging that you’re entitled to feel emotion
7 parts – 5 minutes
Find a place or space within your apartment that you will allow this emotion to emerge. Sit, stand or lay down in the space add 1 part acknowledging that you’re entitled to feel emotion. Then allow the 1 part anger or negative emotion to rise. Give 1 part of the 7 parts – 5 minutes daily until the emotion lessens. When time is over go about your day feeling less stressed and more receptive.